Decisions...decisions...

I am the kind of person that usually doesn't read the manual for things I get, like for a game or how to build something...unless it is absolutely necessary or I find myself lost. But right now, I am at a position in my life where I wish I had a manual...to lead me through life. Things weren't really looking up for me these past few months, that's when I needed it the most. Now everything is kinda ok-ish, but I still wish I had that friggin' manual.

It's hard for me to make decisions, and I bet for most people too, because of the "What if's..." What if I had chosen that instead of this?", "What if I hadn't done this?", "What if I actually had done it?". Not only that, but of all the consequences decisions bring. Life is not like a game in which you can "Retry" or "Restart" if you had a game over, or you didn't get what you want. Even less just turning "Life" off out of frustration and continue another day when you're feeling better. Life goes on, and is continuous. You might be in "Pause", but not life...it keeps going!

And let's say you actually made your decision...Most of the times you have to stick to it! And even if you change your mind and want to go back, things might not be the same.

Life seems to have many branches, based on the decisions and choices you make. I'm always curious of the things that would happen in the future, just like I'm curious of the things that could've happened. I wonder about Life, Family, Happiness, Love, Friendship, Success, Trust...these are all big words for me which I care about...And most of the time, they might clash with each other. For example, you might make yourself happy but might upset and unbalance your family. You might strive for success but that might create some trust issues between your coworkers. And you might be in love, but at the same time sloppy with life cause you are more into your relationship.

So I wonder, not how to choose which one nor how to have 100% of all of them...But instead how to create a balance between all of them...when and where to choose which one rather than just focusing on a single one. This are just thoughts of an insecure mind at the moment...thoughts I wanted to type in...

Up there is Eevee and all its evolutions up until this date August 5, 2011. Now Eevee is a really special Pokemon in which it has a special trait encoded in its genes that allow it to evolve into many forms depending on its environment or if given a certain stone. It evolves into Flareon, Jolteon, or Vaporeon once using the Fire, Thunder, and Water Stones respectively. It evolves into Espeon and Umbreon depending on if you train in the daytime or nighttime. And finally into  Leafeon and Glaceon if it is trained in a certain area such as a forest or a snowy area with a certain rock present. Each evolution is different and has its own pros and cons. There is only one Eevee in each game and only one! Once it evolves that's how it is gonna stay forever, there is no way to make it turn into another one or to change it back...(unless you don't save your game, haha). But if you don't evolve it, it will always stay like Eevee which is much weaker than any of its evolutions. So the trainer must be sure of what it wants and how to do it right in order to get the desired evolution.

In other words one has to be aware of the consequences decisions might bring, live with them, and move on...yet the decision making is the hardest part to do. But if you don't take action...you are just gonna end up with...an Eevee...something weak, normal and plain. As cute as it may be, you have to grow up sometime and make tough choices.